Horror Movie Review: Hell Asylum (2002)
Disgustingly cheap, poorly acted, with a story that is loathsomely boring, the only saving grace of Hell Asylum is the fact that it is barely an hour long. Even then, it drags and drags to its nothing conclusion.
Written by Trent Haaga and directed by Danny Draven, Hell Asylum stars Debra Mayer, Tanya Dempsey, Sunny Lombardo, Stacey Scowley, Olimpia Fernandez and Timothy Muskatell.
Are you ready to win a million dollars by taking part in the Chill Challenge? For five women, who are literal walking stereotypes, it’s an opportunity of a lifetime. All they need to do is spend the night in a supposedly haunted house. Which, of course, has been rigged to give a few frights by the producer of the reality TV show.
Survive the night without running out the door screaming, and you will win. Which sounds easy enough, expect this house might actually be haunted.
It’s a yawn-inducing story made worse by the teeth-pulling length of the introduction that sets up the entire premise. It’s not even about character development either as these women are so cliché that it almost starts to seem like a joke. Except it’s not funny or entertaining. Made all the worse by just how bad the dialogue and acting is. Everyone has the charisma of a plank of wood and there is zero chemistry between the cast.
If you found out that every actor had just met five minutes before shooting, you’d believe it.
Which brings us to the horror aspect of the film. Where an atmospheric location is swapped out for dim lighting. Where the ‘reality’ part of the story means we get poor sound quality and ugly visuals. The evil ghosts? Just people in black cloaks and hoods. As for blood and gore? As bad as everything else and the death scenes employ this mix of shaky and snowy camera work meaning you can barely see what is going on. Probably for the best though as the effects are incredibly subpar.
It’s a very bad movie that somehow manages to overstay its welcome with barely an hour’s runtime. That is an impressive feat.
Author
Hell Asylum (2002)
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The Final Score - 2/10
2/10
