The never-ending Amityville train rolls on and on. A never-ending supply of movies that often have absolutely nothing to do with the original horror but utilise the Amityville name to draw viewers in. It’s become so standard that it almost seems like a joke. We know, we watched a lot of them, and tried to keep up with the constant slew in our definitive ranking here.
One look at Amityville Emanuelle and expectations will be extremely low. Written by Geno McGahee and directed by Louis DeStefano, Amityville Emanuelle does the surprising thing of actually trying to tie this movie’s horror into the original events, both real and imagined.
The movie opens with a short replay of the infamous events of 112 Ocean Avenue. Ronald DeFeo Jr. shot and killed six members of his family. It is a real-life tragedy that has been milked to the point of absurdity.
The movie then jumps 20 years into the future and we’re introduced to Laura Lutz (Dawn Church), the daughter of George and Kathy Lutz. Them being the family who lived in 112 Ocean Avenue and whose tales of paranormal activity are responsible for the name of Amityville being anything more than a footnote in the annuals of history.
We’re also introduced to Gordon (Shane Ryan-Reid), who too happens to have a famous father, his being Ronald DeFeo Jr.
They don’t know each other but they both start to share the same visions of Ronald DeFeo Jr. killing all of Laura’s friends. There’s a Ouija board, a bunch of extra characters who are so forgettable they’re not worth mentioning, and Laura gets possessed by a horny entity.
It sounds like it might actually be fun, but rest assured, it is not. It’s not fun, it’s not entertaining, it’s not scary, it’s not clever, it’s not well written, it’s not well acted, and most importantly, it’s not worth watching.
For all the effort of tying this film into the original horrors surrounding the house and the content that followed, nothing is actually done with it. Unless you think hilariously tame sex scenes and awful characters sitting around talking is doing something.
With 6 minutes left of the film’s 66-minute runtime, Ronald DeFeo Jr. finally possesses someone and attempts to kill the characters. It might be the worst part of the entire movie though as what was amateurish before, hits a new low. It can’t end soon enough.
There have been so many bad movies with the Amityville name it’s really hard to call this the worst you’ll see. It’s not that, but it’s not far off it.
Amityville Emanuelle (2023)
The Final Score - 2/10