Rarely will you see us write these words but Cannibal Terror is a ‘so bad, it’s good’ movie. A movie that is so terrible that it becomes a laugh out loud experience where you end up eagerly awaiting the next squirt of shit it sends your way.
It’s so poorly made, with such an idiotic story and horrendous cast that it even exists is amazing. Although that might have something to do with it sharing locations, cast and dubbing actors with Jesús Franco’s Mondo Cannibale.
A French cannibal movie, Cannibal Terror was directed by Alain Deruelle and stars Silvia Solar, Pamela Stanford and Oliiver Mathot. The story surrounds a group of kidnappers who take their captive (a young girl) into the jungle to hide. After one of the group rapes their host’s wife (in a shocking moment of bad taste), they are forced to flee. Ending up in the clutches of local cannibal tribe. Will be they be able to escape before they become today’s lunch?
The answer is no but that massive spoiler won’t affect how you feel about this film. You’ll either hate it because it is so crap or love because it is so crap. We love it but that doesn’t mean it’s getting a high score or anything. A terrible movie is a terrible movie even if all of that becomes entertaining.
Our advice is you watch with a loved one, have a few beers and just have fun laughing at the stupidity of it all. The stupidity of the plot, the horrible acting and dubbing or the hilarious look of the cannibals (see if you can spot the one with mutton chops or the one with a pin-up tattoo on his chest).
How about the ‘gory’ moments that have actors doing everything possible to not eat the ‘flesh’ of their victim in one scene. Then in the next, has them stuffing what is clearly sausages into their mouths. It’s these moments that you can maybe point at and say, this is why got this on the infamous video nasty list but even by most of those film’s standards, it is very tame.
The only scene that is likely to offend is the wholly unnecessary rape scene. Something that comes out of nowhere, makes no sense to the plot and is just trash film-making. Although it again offers up some amusement as the victim carries the rope that will be used to tie her up and in several shots is clearly holding on to it to make sure it doesn’t come loose.
It’s this kind of terrible film-making that makes Cannibal Terror such fun to watch. You’ll spend all of its runtime (an excruciating 93 minutes) picking and pointing out these issues. If that sounds like your jam, you should certainly check out this slice of Cannibal history.
The Final Score - 1/10